Breaking news from English football: a toaster is not a hair blower

Dexter Haven
3 min readApr 20, 2021

You can’t take a toaster back to the store. And complain it’s not a hair blower.

And you can’t take a capitalist back to the store. And complain because it’s not a philanthropist.

We have no love for the U. S. billionaires who are leading the abandonment of the biggest clubs in England from the established league. And leading them to greener pastures elsewhere.

And we understand fans who scream “Hey, you can’t do that! What about the fans? What about centuries of tradition? We thought you were sportsmen?”

“We are,” they’ll say. “But we’re businessmen first.”

And they won’t be wrong.

Maybe we’re wrong. Wrong in believing that capitalism is supposed to have a conscience.

Isn’t that what we have always been led to believe? That Capitalism and Democracy hold hands in a field of daisies festooned with high sounding principles such as free speech, free elections, market driven economies and free trade?

And weren’t we further led to believe that capitalism and democracy work so well on our soil. It’s our moral obligation to the people of the world to bring it to their country.

Sometimes at gunpoint.

The truth is, capitalism doesn’t have a conscience. And hasn’t that been our experience with unregulated capitalism? Deregulation of the financial services sector? Deregulation of the banking industry? We could go on. Read the fine print.

And flash news: capitalists will take their capital to the best environment they can find. So little capital can mate with other little capital and produce little capital babies.

This is the biggest billionaire story out of Europe in recent memory. But staying in Europe there’s an even bigger story brewing. Though much less dramatic.

The WEF has among them the richest individuals and corporations in the world. Arguably the most powerful and influential people on the planet. The WEF will break bread in Switzerland next month. And there they will further the conversation known enigmatically as “The Great Reset”. Enigmas aside. The world’s wealthy elite and politically elite are taking actions they believe are too important and too urgent to be left in the hands of the government. Global health and the global health of the environment are issues they cite.

Many of their meetings will be private.

But we’ve seen the menu. And we know what they’re having for dinner: You.

So, literally within two months or so of each other. We have two stories about the billionaire class making decisions which affect millions.

One story is a dramatic story about football. And the emotional hardship and disillusionment that can follow when the public make assumptions about capitalists that capitalists have no intention of fulfilling.

And the other story is a less dramatic story about a bunch of old people meeting in Switzerland to talk about their favorite subject. How the two per cent who own nearly half the wealth on the planet can help the planet and themselves at the same time.

If anyone has questions or concerns about what will go on at the World Economic Forum next month.

We have a suggestion.

Speak to the Fan Club at Manchester United.

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Dexter Haven

Former syndicated columnist; former political speechwriter; former media head for a Fortune 500 company.